Mama Memoirs: Being a young Mama

I turned 25 at the beginning of this month and all I could think while going to bed, was that for the past 4 years and 1.5 months, my little boy has been apart of my life. The day before my 21st birthday, I got to go and see a little pea sized baby on an ultrasound screen. It seemed so surreal. Like I was living someone else's life. The life of maybe a 27 year old...'cause isn't that the age most women say they became "ready" to get pregnant? They have a stable job, a house, a great network of friends, and a husband of at least 2-3 years. At least that's what Mr. t.v. always told me.

Oh Me? I became pregnant around six months of marriage and in my junior year of University. Most people in my family thought I got married too young and would somehow miss out on life as a young single. All I could think was, well if I want to spend my young days with Ben anyway, heck, might as well marry the guy! The after finding out I was pregnant, all I could do was begin to feel like everyone was right. That I was heading down the road of most Kentucky girls. A barefoot pregnant University dropout.

After traveling all across the United States for summer sales (Georgia, Utah, Washington) We ended up in good ol', Sin City, LasVegas. And that's where my life changed even more dramatically. My lil' boy arrived. He was the cutest little blue eyed babe I had ever seen. I cried instantly when he was placed in my arms and couldn't stop telling all the nurses and Ben how beautiful he was. I wanted everyone to come and admire him, to see how lovely he was. I had gone through a hard pregnancy of travel and being away from my own mother during this important time of life and had gotten so much pregnancy acne all over my face that I didn't even look in the mirror without crying. But seeing my baby made the worst 9 months of my life, worth it. Completely and utterly worth it.

Becoming a mother at 21 in today's society has been hard. I sometimes find myself feeling left out. Left out of all the fun other couples seem to have pre-babies. Left out of having a true newly wed first year with Ben. For awhile I got really depressed about it. Living in Canada, surrounded by other couples who are my age and just getting married or having their first baby, kind of makes me feel like my life didn't happen in the right sequence. Most people view me as being 28 because I already have two kids.

When I think about my life, I realize that I don't let my kids hold me back.
Trip to Europe? CHECK
Live in a different country? CHECK (Canada does count, right?)
Develop new talents? CHECK
Learn to cook/bake? CHECK
I've achieved things in my life that only a mother can. I've been blessed to have two sweet kids who make life hard and fulfilling all at the same time. I've worked hard extremely hard and gotten my pre-baby body back! I know I can do anything I strive for and my two kids are my biggest cheer leaders.

So, to all you other moms who started having babies before you were 'ready' -because seriously, who is?- to you moms who had to wait forever to finally get the badge of motherhood, to you moms who are working like heck to get back in those skinny jeans, to you moms who work outside the home, to you moms who stay home, to you angelic moms who adopt, to you moms who are single or divorced, to you moms who have 2 or more kids, I say to you: YOU ARE ONE FREAKIN' AMAZING MOTHER, AND DON'T YOU DARE FORGET IT!

And just to make this post even longer, my brother-in-law posted this on facebook the other day. I seriously laughed so hard at lessons 7 & 8. Whoever wrote this, they get it. And it makes me happy that someone gets it.
11 Step Program for those thinking of Having Kids: (from a good friend...had to share!)

Lesson 1

1. Go to the grocery store.

2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home.

4. Pick up the paper.

5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2

Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...

1. Methods of discipline.

2. Lack of patience.

3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.

4. Allowing their children to run wild.

5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.

Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3

A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)

2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.

4. Set the alarm for 3AM.

5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.

6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.

7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.

8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.

9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4

Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out...

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.

2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.

4. Then rub them on the clean walls.

5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.

6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5

Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.

1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.

Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6

Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.

1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.

Leave it there.

2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.

3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.

4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7

Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8

1. Hollow out a melon.

2. Make a small hole in the side.

3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.

4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.

5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.

6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.

You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9

Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years.

Lesson 10

Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11

Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.